good morning! or good evening or good day as it may be in your world....
isn't it funny how life is all relative to someone's perspective? now don't get me wrong and think i've turned into some postmodern relativist who thinks there are no absolutes. but it's funny how if you look at something from a different angle than someone else, it can seem to be a completely different object. huh. makes me think of that ol' story about the blind men and the elephant (i'm gonna' botch this one!)...they each grabbed hold of a different part of the elephant....one grabbed the trunk, one the leg, one the tusk...and they each thought it a different entity. respectively, one thought it a snake, one a tree, one a sword. in a lot of ways, understanding the truth behind life relies on one having the correct perspective.
in so many ways He renewed and 'set aright' my perspective on life when i was in Estes. while many of you may find my reference to my time there quite wearying, please bear with me. i'm still kinda' 'getting' what all He spoke to me there.
while in Estes, i started to get that life really is to be lived out as a fantastically powerful creature filled with Him. there is no letting go of that identity. and the more i live out of that the better.
but i find myself slacking in the identity department...to such a degree that for a moment i lack vision and faith, and start calling what place i'm currently in a snake or a tree or a sword...
6 months down now. and still lacking so many of the tangible things we call 'necessary' for 'normal' life. but i realize that 'normal' is all a matter of perspective...and that all my needs are met in Him.
praying that my heart echoes even louder today, 'i have no need, no good, apart from You my sweet Jesus'...
Saturday, August 25, 2007
Thursday, August 9, 2007
honestly? it's past the point of good humor
you know, there's this point where patience wears out. it no longer speaks for you. it no longer responds gracefully. it no longer bides my time. it no longer gives moments of peace in the midst of chaos. it no longer provides support and home simply by it's presence.
when this patience wears out i'm left confused, wondering.
this week, i've felt a little like an orphan. i hate even saying the word orphan in respect to myself. it makes me feel ungrateful. after all, i am not without a superior set of 'rents. and i've a perfect Father in heaven to boot. but, there's something about a family...they're supposed to provide a solid compass. problem is, while my Father has been speaking so many abstract things to me, there is NO concrete stuff to be heard. hard to have a solid compass when all you hear is ethereal. and one of the worst things (to me) is His quiet. He has a plan for my life. yet He shares it not. this lack of sharing on His part leaves me biting my tongue from calling Him 'stingy'....
i'm tired of the intangible. 6 months now. intangible faith. my faith well's run on empty for some time...He's just been giving me the daily requirement. but, bottoms up and there's not a drop today. i mean, i've faith that i'll have food and drink. i'll have a place to lay this ol' noggin. but, those heart things...those dreams. those communal needs. those desires for living a life greater than me....seem to sift out of that cup like dust left after all moisture's evaporated.
all walking done today is done with no sense of emotionalism. there's no 'good feelings' cheering me on to greater heights. rather, my sustaining factor is simply grit. grit and a little whisper. on second thought, it's probably moreso the little whisper...if you're living the grit whisper, rock on. let's bond.
but amidst it all...i'm still solidly planted in His plan for me. i just wish He'd share the next step with me...walking. listening. and finding myself a little gripey...
but still so enchanted by Him that i can't let go...
when this patience wears out i'm left confused, wondering.
this week, i've felt a little like an orphan. i hate even saying the word orphan in respect to myself. it makes me feel ungrateful. after all, i am not without a superior set of 'rents. and i've a perfect Father in heaven to boot. but, there's something about a family...they're supposed to provide a solid compass. problem is, while my Father has been speaking so many abstract things to me, there is NO concrete stuff to be heard. hard to have a solid compass when all you hear is ethereal. and one of the worst things (to me) is His quiet. He has a plan for my life. yet He shares it not. this lack of sharing on His part leaves me biting my tongue from calling Him 'stingy'....
i'm tired of the intangible. 6 months now. intangible faith. my faith well's run on empty for some time...He's just been giving me the daily requirement. but, bottoms up and there's not a drop today. i mean, i've faith that i'll have food and drink. i'll have a place to lay this ol' noggin. but, those heart things...those dreams. those communal needs. those desires for living a life greater than me....seem to sift out of that cup like dust left after all moisture's evaporated.
all walking done today is done with no sense of emotionalism. there's no 'good feelings' cheering me on to greater heights. rather, my sustaining factor is simply grit. grit and a little whisper. on second thought, it's probably moreso the little whisper...if you're living the grit whisper, rock on. let's bond.
but amidst it all...i'm still solidly planted in His plan for me. i just wish He'd share the next step with me...walking. listening. and finding myself a little gripey...
but still so enchanted by Him that i can't let go...
Thursday, August 2, 2007
ESTES PARK PRE-RELEASE!!!
YEAH! the time has come for a pre-release party for the cd!
a sigh of relief! so. if you are in the Houston area, you've simply GOT TO come by and take a listen...and bring your friends!
Tallowood Baptist Church.
North Campus.
22 August 2007.
7:30pm.
Give me a holler if you have any questions!!! can't wait!!!
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